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Take My Life AwayTears crashing around me
my heart speeding up
the anxiety that is about to happen
there is no way to escape
The emotions I feel inside
the hurt all around
There is no hope left to this life
There is nothing worth living
All the torture we are put through
all the emotions that we feel
There is no reason to live
a life that gives us pain
The tears rolling down
the cuts deep in my skin
all I wish in life
was to take my own life
The blade closer to my arms
the blood pouring on my skin
the redness is all i see
as my face turn to pale
I want to risk my own life
to feel all the pain deep inside
I want to take my life away
and forever it will all be better
I'm tired of it AllI'm tired of being know as
the person with "problems"
I'm tired of being known as
the person with "disabilities"
I'm tired of being a mistake to this world
An unworthy failure in this life
Just because I have these problems
and not many understand them...
I'm tired of being judged
because they don't fully know me
To deal with this pain
and faking it all day long
I'm tired of putting a mask on
I just want to scream to the world
and tell everybody how I truly feel....
I'm tired of living a lie in my life
To pretend that everything is alright
while deep down
I am dying
I'm just tired of dealing with everything
Pretending to have this smile
to not feel the pain
That I truly feel deep down...
Dreaming of YouEvery night I dream of you
wishing upon a star
that you were here for real
Every night I lay in bed
a dream so wonderful
cause you are in it
I dream of being with you
to grow old together
a day never apart
only you are in my thoughts
A feeling so wonderful
it is in my heart
the love that grows
stronger each day
Every night I think of you
our love is for real
you are always here
I dream of happiness
being with you all the time
a dream so magical
that everything seem so real
you are here with me
keeping me safe
throughout the night
After all it is just a dream
but I promise you
that one day it will be real
So for now I will just dream
of seeing you in sight
cause some day it will happen
that you will be in my arms
Leave this WorldI will slit my wrists
to watch the blood fall to the floor
to end my life for good
and nobody cry a single tear
I will leave this world
pretend that I never existed
This life dont need me no more
I am better off gone from this world
I will slit my wrists
to ease the pain
I can't take the crying
I can't take this pain
There is no hope in this world
There is no reason to live
I will leave this world for good
Maybe someday I will be reborn
I am a GirlI am a girl who smiles
when things aren't always happy
I am a girl who cries
but stands up and starts over
I am a girl who is Bisexual
that loves both of the sexes
I am a girl in love
with 2 people
I am a girl that is strong
when most are weak
I am a girl that smiles all the time
when everything is falling apart
I am a girl that sheds a tear
but starts all over again
I am a girl that never gives up
when things don't go her way
I am a girl with a heart
a girl that is in love
I am a girl that cares deeply
for those she truly loves
I am a girl who is in love
with a guy as well as a girl
I am a girl that is Bisexual
and stands up for what she believes is right
I am not a whore
I am not a slut
I am just a girl
that should be treated fairly
I am a girl with a difference
I am a girl with opinions
I am a girl that does not care
I am a girl who will always be Me
I don't belong hereI don't belong
in this world full of hate
Cause it is not who I am
I don't deserve this torture
I don't belong
to live on earth anymore
cause this life was never meant to be
and I'm not worth the suffering in life
I don't belong
to be here to this day
I have given up
the need to belong
I don't think I'm strong enough
to hold onto this life that I live
I don't belong here
to be put through this torment in life
No matter what I try to do
It is never good enough
I don't belong here
it is not what I want in life
I need YouI need to feel your touch
I need to love you
I need to hear your heart beat
and to always hear your voice
You lighten up my world
You bring happiness within my life
I need to be with you
to always have smiles on my face
I need you here
I need you there
I need you with all my heart
cause without you I am nothing
I need you to want me
I need you to love me
Cause I will always love you
deep within me
I always want to show you
I always want to be here for you
I need you to be with me
cause without you, I am nothing
So love me forever
love me always
For with you in my life
There will always be love
I need to feel your touch
To hear your voice
I need to always be with you
Cause my love, you complete my world
Because I love youBecause of you
this world is a better place
The love that we share
will cherish my life forever
Because of you
I can freely walk around
To not feel an ounce of pain
because you took it all away
Because I love you
I know that this love will grow
My heart tells me its the truth
and forever I will trust my heart
Because you love me
I live my life to the fullest
With a smile so bright to this world
there will never be sadness in my life
Because of you
I know that I have found hope
Cause thanks to you
I will forever have love within my life
The reason is YouLove had no meaning
Love had no purpose
Everything finally became real
the moment you stepped into my life
Love had no cure
to all hearts that been broken
Love had no passion
for there was nothing to feel
But you came into my life
and gave me the love that I needed
The love that was never there
finally became real to this world
You broke down this wall.
You came into my life
You were the reason
that I will always feel the love
There was no reason for Love
There was no reason to feel it
But you came into my life
and made all the pain go away
Love will now have a purpose
Love will now be the real reason
Cause with you in my life
There will always be this feeling
A real feeling that I never had
a purpose to keep moving forward
cause thanks to you
Love is the best feeling of all
TornadoI feel invisible, untouchable. I feel like nothing could do any harm on me but myself. Have you ever felt this way? Have you ever felt like you weren’t here, only your body, staring at nothing at all, like something caught your attention, but there’s only a white wall in front of you?
I feel like a blank canvas, impermeable. Wrapped around a rough translucent paper, and no one could take it off of me.
I feel like nothing. Have you ever felt like that? I don’t know what nothing is for real, but I also don’t know how I can feel it so strongly like I could explain it for hours. But I can’t because I don’t know what it is. There are so many words inside my head, messing my mind around that I don’t feel able to put it off and let it clear to understand, even for myself.
Secret WordsI know you need help.
It's so plain to see.
Please don't hurt yourself.
You can count on me.
I'll hold you when it's tough,
wrap you up tight.
I know life is rough,
but I'll be your light.
I love you, I do.
You're everything to me.
you don't believe it's true,
but I want to set you free.
I'll be your rock
when all your strength is gone.
I'll be your lock
when everythings gone wrong.
So please don't cry,
my love, my life.
I know you want to die,
but I'll help you through the strife.
Because I'll be there to catch you
when everything falls apart.
I love you, it's so true,
with all of my heart.
Wasted Words.Wasted Words.
We wait for the last possible moment.
Even when confronting our opponents.
How we truly feel.
We hide behind our counterfeit expressions.
Conceal and contain our countless confessions.
Failing to announce,
What our mouths long to pronounce.
We purposely squander opportunities.
Maintaining our positions within our communities.
Avoiding any disclosure,
Reducing the risk of exposure.
We use humour to dilute what we actually say.
Because the truth does not have to be revealed today.
We know there always is a tomorrow,
So today has not got to be filled with sorrow.
We wait and wait.
Stall and prolong.
Until it’s too late
And the moment has gone.
There is never a convenient time.
For us to say what is really on our minds.
It takes the sight of a death bed.
Why Don't You Understand?Do you understand what it's like to be dead among the living?
When your heart keeps beating against its will?
The feeling is surreal, standing in the crowd of those who claim to be living.
Where everyone around me has a fear of the end; of death.
That's not me.
I see a beauty in the decay of life, a peace even.
Unlike the living, I understand death is a release from the world of pain we live in.
An understanding I wish to convey.
The fear I see in the eyes of others; I don't understand like I used to.
All fear is based on the same thing; a fear of loss.
Fear of pain?
Only a fear of losing comfort.
Fear of failure?
Only a fear in losing what you hope to achieve.
Fear in death?
Only a fear in losing this world.
But when you have nothing to lose, what is there to fear?
A dead among the living, oh the things I wish I could teach you.
Make you understand.
But the words w
MeMy name is unloved,
I live in hell,
curled up in my shell.
I dream of death,
escaping this place
by ceasing my breath.
This is me,
crying in despair,
wishing to be free.
Will I ever know joy,
or will I stay here forever,
your broken little toy?
going, going, going...going.
he wasn't the kind of boy you brought home,
but the kind you fell for the minute
his smile turned to you;
the kind who's eyes haunted your dreams.
winter was warm spent in the circle of his arms,
not a single chill invaded the space
between his hands and his heart;
the space you tried desperately to occupy.
he wasn’t one who took well to apologizing,
but how the I'm sorry's fell from his lips
when you tried to leave;
the door never seemed further away.
summer beat down on you with all its might,
and as the heat came so too did his temper
which made you want to cry for help;
you took to hiding the bruises instead.
he wasn't always this way with you,
but when the anger came
he changed before your eyes;
you kept thinking it was your fault.
this time there was no oxygen left for forgiveness,
he'd knocked it from your lungs
and left you breathless on the floor;
you didn't notic
Truest HomeI took my mask off,
showed my true face,
but you threw it back at me,
called me a disgrace.
No one wants to see.
No one wants to hear
about my hopes and dreams,
my memories and fear.
They'd rather I stayed quiet,
shy and in my place,
but I can't stay behind.
I want to run the race.
"No!" They cry.
Stay where you belong.
No one wants to hear
your misery song.
So crawl back in the dark,
with your monsters and fear.
Sit there quietly,
year after year.
Never going to get out,
never going to get free.
This is where I belong.
This is the truest home for me.
My SecretsMy secrets held since i was a kid.
Wish I could have ran and hid.
Hearing a voice since I was ten.
Now that's out in the open.
Don't know what Mom would say.
Expected her to shy away.
Instead she seems perfectly fine.
With this strange diagnosis of mine.
I didn't know that that could be.
Someone could truly accept me.
With relief I breathe a sigh.
No longer do I need to lie.
Society's Eyes.Don't eat, don't breath, don't smile or sleep,
Endless promises no longer to keep.
Troubles locked up that now want out,
shadows quiver with so much doubt.
Obsessed with society's being,
that everyone has distress seeing.
Skinny, fat, ugly, or pretty,
The worlds eyes that see no pity.
Stand up now tall and strong,
when everyone says that you are wrong.
The sun shines through bright and true,
it wipes away that shade of blue.
Know deep down that you are human too,
Uniqueness is vast so just be you.
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Endorell-Taelos is very well known within the community for her selfless giving and gracious community spirit. Since joining DeviantART over seven years ago, Alicia has continued to make a positive impact on many deviants. Her helpful and thoughtful approach was one of her finest attributes when serving as a Community Volunteer, and this has continued throughout the many contests which Alicia provides on a regular basis. As we approach our Birthday celebrations, we can't... Read More